You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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