your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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