girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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