I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
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Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
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I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
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