It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize