Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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