It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize