I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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