check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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