We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Randomize