White coat. Heels.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
Randomize