No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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