i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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