please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize