no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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