Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
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