Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Randomize