Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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