I bet he comes in French.
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
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