last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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