If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This show inspires me to have sex in space
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Randomize