you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
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