Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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