Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
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