why do cheetos always look like penises
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
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