Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are my feet made of real feet?
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize