he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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