Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
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Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
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Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
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