all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I made him laugh his dick is mine
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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