Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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