at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize