1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
I am in a vortex of obligation.
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
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