It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize