make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Randomize