we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
I forgot wine drunk hurts
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
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