the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
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