I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
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