Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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