i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
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