god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Randomize