He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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