Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
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yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
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Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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