Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
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