Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
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i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
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We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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