Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
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