he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize