I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Randomize