The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
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he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
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Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
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