jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
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