why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
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is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
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YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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